Today my schedule is to
- Go to Aqua Fit at the Community Pool in Stopsley Village
- Go to the Market Hall in the shopping centre for lunch
- Have a mentor session
- Go and see the Informers play at O'Sheas Bar and Grill
Instead I head to the centre of town to find the Market Hall hidden in shopping centre in the middle of town. The shopping centre is pretty dominating in town - its a huge space and it takes me a while to find the Market Hall. When I do I'm happy I have. It's full of little stalls - refreshingly unique compared to the usual high street shops in the rest of the shopping centre. There are some guys watching football on a small tv screen, a strong smell in the air - the nail bar, and opticians, fabric and food stalls. It reminds me of some of the best indoor markets in London - Seven Sisters Latin Village (currently under threat because of developers) and the Nags Head Market in Holloway Road. I love how relaxed it is here. I try to slow down, be more conscious of taking everything in. Bright pinks, yellows, and green colours zip through the space.
I find somewhere to eat. There are lots of choices - jamaican, kenyan, thai, and indian food... Tea and coffee 75p. Cash only. I find the one I want to stay in - a small cosy looking cafe with Malaysian food.
There are two guys ordering food in front of me. One sits ontop of the cafe's chest freezer. He says to the chef 'I want to watch what your doing. I really like cooking.' He eagle eyes the chefs movements who looks a bit nervous from the attention. ‘I want the very best of the best. With lots of vegetables’ ‘can I have some more vegetables’ 'eat my greens.' he starts to sing.
I listen to a man making a tune with his knife and fork in the cafe opposite and spend time just sitting enjoying where I am.
- Go to Aqua Fit at the Community Pool in Stopsley Village
- Go to the Market Hall in the shopping centre for lunch
- Go and see the Informers play at O'Sheas Bar and Grill
Today I have a small but sore wound on my leg - so no aqua fit for me today (doctors appointment on Sunday).
Instead I head to the centre of town to find the Market Hall hidden in shopping centre in the middle of town. The shopping centre is pretty dominating in town - its a huge space and it takes me a while to find the Market Hall. When I do I'm happy I have. It's full of little stalls - refreshingly unique compared to the usual high street shops in the rest of the shopping centre. There are some guys watching football on a small tv screen, a strong smell in the air - the nail bar, and opticians, fabric and food stalls. It reminds me of some of the best indoor markets in London - Seven Sisters Latin Village (currently under threat because of developers) and the Nags Head Market in Holloway Road. I love how relaxed it is here. I try to slow down, be more conscious of taking everything in. Bright pinks, yellows, and green colours zip through the space.
I find somewhere to eat. There are lots of choices - jamaican, kenyan, thai, and indian food... Tea and coffee 75p. Cash only. I find the one I want to stay in - a small cosy looking cafe with Malaysian food.
There are two guys ordering food in front of me. One sits ontop of the cafe's chest freezer. He says to the chef 'I want to watch what your doing. I really like cooking.' He eagle eyes the chefs movements who looks a bit nervous from the attention. ‘I want the very best of the best. With lots of vegetables’ ‘can I have some more vegetables’ 'eat my greens.' he starts to sing.
'What’s that sauce please?'
I wonder what they are doing, where they’ve been before, where they’re going after. I guess they’re good friends. I like the interaction. Sometimes, I feel people are so boundaried with strangers. I have friends like this, people who really enjoy interacting with strangers and places. Making the most of where they are. Enjoying through talking touching moving, making people laugh.
I look over at the chef who looks a me a bit in disbelief. The two guys take their take away.
I really enjoy the noodles and green tea. Some great chilli oil too. Delicious.
I listen to a man making a tune with his knife and fork in the cafe opposite and spend time just sitting enjoying where I am.
Later in the evening I head to O'Sheas. I'm a bit nervous about this. Since being in Luton I have been hyper aware about how cautious I am going out at night. It's the same in London. My bike becomes my safety and I really rely on it as a way to create space and protection in the night time. I text my boyfriend saying I don't really want to go.
I'm happy to go out on my own in general to places - cafes and restaurants, but its something about doing things in the nighttime as a woman alone - particularly going to a pub I don't know.
Just one drink I tell myself, and I assure myself that it's very close to where I live.
I arrive and the band are just playing their last song before they take a break.
David Bowie comes on the speaker
Whoa whoa
Lots of people in couples, or big groups. Loud cheers. A row of men on bar stools at the bar.
It's a friendly pub and I'm welcomed into the space, but for now I don't feel like being in a pub alone.
Massive claps
Drunken Friday night
Whoah whoah
I hide in my phone.
If I was a man maybe I’d be up at the bar chatting away meeting someone? A sense of guilt comes in - should I be meeting people?
Deep breath in. I’m going to finish my pint soon
We’re on a road to nowhere... we're on a road to no where. my head nods along then the song fades out.
I fought the law and the law won!!!
The clash.
£4 a pint - this would be like £6 in London.
I lost my girl and
She’s the best girl I ever had
I think back to times I have been made to feel unsafe or had unsolicited advances from men. How this becomes internalised. There are terrible statistics about violence towards women world wide - the UN states it effects 1 in 3 women and the statistics increase if you are a trans woman, and more in certain countries if your a trans woman of colour. I go on google. I find this article - What would a city that is safe for women look like? https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2018/dec/13/what-would-a-city-that-is-safe-for-women-look-like and I remember the women's night march Reclaim the Night http://www.reclaimthenight.co.uk . I read an article about Pxssy Palace a queer club night in London that centres Queer womxn, Trans, NB & Intersex POC. They have started to offer free taxi rides home for trans people of colour which is paid by donations on the door and fundraisers. I am really inspired by this and think more about what could be done to support each other. https://www.dazeddigital.com/life-culture/article/38887/1/this-club-night-is-making-sure-trans-people-of-colour-get-home-safely
For now Im sitting here and I have a small amount of beer left. I think I've been here 15 minutes.
Rock the Casbah, rock the casbar.
I notice the informer have their own band sign behind the stage.
Rock the casbah rock the casbah
Golden brown
Whay hay.
